Recipe Source: Shelbyville Times Gazette (reprint of recipe from unknown newspaper in Maryland)
Recipe: Strawberry Pie for a President
Music to cook by: Let it Be
I have had no victories in the theater of war that is my kitchen since I started this project. With my morale sunk deep in the mire of a soggy flour and butter coated battlefield, I needed help. I needed a 5-star General to lead me into my next battle, my own personal D-Day. I needed Ike, Dwight Eisenhower (one of my favorite presidents).
I armed myself with the best strawberry artillery I could find and set out to face my own internal Normandy Beach. Though this recipe didn’t come with pie crust instructions, I filled myself with a 1 1/4 cups of Eisenhower courage, or cheap Merlot as we call it in my house, and decided to attempt a pie crust. It was a disaster of crust nuclear proportions.
Being a prepared soldier, however, I had stashed a store-bought crust among my battery of baking goods. I brushed off my worries, signed a store-bought pie crust peace treaty, and tossed that bad boy into the oven. Pessimism would not claim me as its victim.
With the pie crust defeat averted, it was time to mix up the pie filling. The preparation went smoothly and my goal looked to be within target. As I unloaded the strawberry mush into the crust, however, fear gripped me. It was a fear I couldn’t shake and ended up taking to bed with me. I had nightmares…………strawberry-zombie pie kind of nightmares. I awoke tired and filled with dread. I had to face my Great Grandmother Experiment recipe judges, The Mechanics.
Turns out my worries were unwarranted.
The pie was very good. Steve the Mechanic accused me of trying to pass off a Shoney’s pie as my own. Ike’s pie was better than Shoney’s. Though the pie was a big hit, the topic of conversation was focused more on the weaponry I had brought to cut the pie.
Cliff the Mechanic gasped when I pulled out my chosen knife to cut the inaugural piece. He said, “Jim Bowie ain’t got nothing on you. You need to take that thing with you on your next date! If things start going bad, you can say, ‘excuse me while I whip this out.’” The conversation quickly disintegrated into a Lorena Bobbett joke exchange. Mechanics. Gotta love ‘em.
In the end, I think The Mechanics were relieved that I had cooked something edible. Like dedicated cheerleaders, they were still complimenting me the next day.
In preparation for this blog I spent time refreshing my knowledge of our 34th president. A lot of his ideals, beliefs and policies are what I look for in presidential candidates. The 2012 class of Republican candidates is sorely, and I mean SORELY, missing some crucial Eisenhoweristic characteristics. They just don’t make Republicans the way they use to. Maybe I should offer the GOP some strawberry pie.
Thanks Ike for the lesson you have left us! I would be mad crushing on you if I was a constituent in your day!