The Bused Cheerleader – Day 161

Day 161
Listening to: Thriller
Thought for the day: Happy All Saints’ Day

Today I posted a cheerleading photo of myself from 1980 along with a photo of me wearing the same cheerleading outfit 32 years later for Halloween. Though I would not dare try to move like a cheerleader in the outfit now (it is much tighter), it still fits. I’m proud of the fact. I thought it apropos that I should also post my public bus rider card as well. During middle school, I was bused to Cameron, a school located in urban Nashville. If I stayed after school for cheerleading practice, I had to ride the city bus home. This was my city bus pass. Easy rider baby!

I Did NOT Tell Liam Neeson To Turn His Head & Cough – Day 160

Day 160
Listening to:  Green Light
Thought for the day:  Never give up.

Grow a Boyfriend Part 2

After experiencing an epic “Grow a Boyfriend” failure, I received a ton of advice (some of it not suitable for mentioning here).  I tossed him in the trash. Then, a voice of reason spoke up.  My friend Rene Googled the situation and told me that most people said it would take a 72 hour soak for the boyfriend to grow versus the 2 hours soak suggested on the packaging.  So.  I dug him out of the trash and put him back in the water.  I named him Liam Neeson.   Today’s photo of Liam was taken at the 48 hour mark.  I will do a second video at the 72 hour mark.   Oddly enough, in the past 48 hours Liam crossed his legs and turned his head to the left.  I didn’t tell him to turn his head and cough y’all.  I swear. HE IS GROWING THOUGH!

In case you missed video #1, here it is.

Video #2 will be posted tomorrow or Thursday.

Hearts In Unusual Places – Day 159

Day 159
Listening to: 
The Tide is High (thanks Dana)
Thought for the dayHurricane Sandy

Today during lunch, I set out on my daily walk beneath a cloudless sky, a brisk wind, and an intense cold sun. Despite the chill in the air, it was a spectacular day.  It was difficult to imagine that the Northeast faced unimaginable destruction at the breath of a storm named Sandy.    Pretty much all I thought about today (along with many of you) was the hurricane.  Along my walking path, I saw this heart in the gravel and it gave me hope.  Hearts show up in the most unusual places and they will in the aftermath of Sandy too.

Note: In case the photo is not discernible, you are looking at some weird weeds growing in gravel!

Bacon, Eggs, and Best Friends – Day 158

Day 158
Listening to: 
Back in Time
Thought for the day:
Friends are relatives you make for yourself.  ~Eustache Deschamps

Most of the things my Dad told me when I was younger turned out to be correct despite my teenage insistence he was wrong.   There is one thing he told me that he was very wrong about and it’s huge.  When I was in high school, he told me that when I reached his age (the age I am now) that I would no longer be friends with the people I called friends in high school.  Oh how wrong he was.   Of course, back then, he had no way of knowing how the internet and social media would re-glue us all back together either.

So what does that have to do with bacon and eggs?  NOT. A. DAMN. THING.   I spent today hanging out with Sabrina, one of my best friends from high school, at the Titans versus Colts game.  I happened to see this pair dressed up at the game while I was waiting on her to go to the bathroom.   These two have to be good friends.  Have bacon and eggs ever NOT been friends?

Breaking Sock Rules – Day 157

Day 157
Listening to:  Fat Bottomed Girls
Thought for the day:  How many candles should I light to emulate a fireplace?

I awoke this morning to a gray sky and a cold breeze out of the north harking of the arrival of winter.  My immediate thought was, “I need a fireplace.”  As my day comes to a close all I can think is, “I need a fireplace.”   In between my bookend “I need a fireplace” moments, I wore these socks………….. and these sandals…………… and I broke every fashion rule between here and the old man wearing black dress socks, polyester shorts, and tennis shoes.   My feet, however, could care less that we are fireplace-less.   That is the point of it all.

I posted my socked sandaled feet on Instagram.  Immediately, one of my male friends who has been working with me on my self-confidence messaged me and  simply said, “We need to talk about your socks. They seem a little Christina Ricci a la “The Ice Storm.”   He then told me to burn them.   My response?  I DON’T HAVE A FIREPLACE!

A Grow A Boyfriend Experiment – Day 156

Day 156
Listening to:  Jump In Line (Shake Senora)
Thought for the day:  Beetlejuice Beetlejuice Beetlejuice

A few years ago, a friend of mine gave me my very own “Grow a Boyfriend” toy.  He sat on my desk for years next to a doll named Mr. Wonderful and my William Shatner Bobblehead.  Today, I stared at him, and then it hit me.  I had to see if he worked.    I captured the experiment on video (see link at end).  Insert your own jokes.  There are plenty.  Needless to say, I think the doll had an expiration date that I exceeded.  In the end, I hesitated to throw the Grow a Boyfriend in the garbage.  What if there was, like, some voodoo quality to it all?

Here is the video:

Fake Fire Fun at the Factory – Day 155

Day 155
Listening to:  Girl You Know It’s True
Thought for the day:  Fake fire fun at the factory!

Today I decided to venture into the mechanic’s shop during their break.  While we were cutting up, we heard the evacuation alarm.  It was a drill.  I knew it.  Instead of heading directly to the exit like I would in a real evacuation, I went to the bathroom and then returned to my office to get my sunglasses and cell phone.  It’s an evacuation foul.  I know.  I can’t help it that I had to pee and knew there would be photo moments once we were outside!   You’re looking at Kevin, the mechanic, and I.  Obviously, he evacuated like he was supposed to………….. sans pee break and sunglasses/cell phone.

While we were all standing outside, numerous cars drove by.  I can’t believe no one has called me to ask, “What was going on down at the plant? “  The mechanics and I joked that had we known there was going to be a drill we would have brought out signs to make it look like we were on strike.

The Wine Glass Chandelier – Day 154

Day 154
Listening to: World Series Game 1
Thought for the day: This World Series has the best names! Posey, Scutaro, Prince Fielder, Verlander, Zito. It’s like a freaking Jane Austen book about baseball!

Wednesday Night Dinner Club – Mirko – 1520 Demonbreun (Music Row)

Hey! It’s a wine glass chandelier. How cute is this? The chandelier hangs in Mirko. I own 3 wine glasses. If this bad boy was in my house, I’d probably be borrowing a glass from it regularly! Tonight the WNDC ventured to the Italian eatery, Mirko. From its handmade pastas to its large variety of sauces, this place is stone cold legit EYE-TALIAN! I highly recommend it.

Here’s the thing. This place is on Music Row, home to all of the big dog music publishing companies. As I was leaving, a bevy of musicians were lined up on the sidewalk giving an informal concert. Their voices were golden. There is no doubt in my mind each one of them harbored a secret intense desire to be discovered. It was at this moment I thanked God I cannot sing. To live here and have some unseen force pushing me to make the big time would have to be painful. Truth is I don’t even have the desire to be an accomplished writer. I probably need to change that. Where does that shit come from? (Pardon my language, but I have no other word at this moment.)

Cougars and Tree Hearts – Day 153

Day 153
Listening to: Night and Day (Al B Sure)
Thought for the day: RAWR!!!!

I posted a photo of the silhouette of this tree in a prior post. It is the heart tree next to my house. In the daylight, I imagine the transformer and electrical lines are the tree heart’s arteries supplying energy to the world. What does this really mean? Nothing exciting happened to day. Of course there was this conversation…………

Coworker 1: Consider this scenario. Kris wins the lottery or marries a Tennessee Titan and quits her job.
Me: I am more likely to win the lottery.
Coworker 2: What? How do you figure that?
Me: Guys. I just don’t have the confidence to be a cougar.
Coworker 3: What is a cougar?
Me: It’s an old woman who goes after a younger man.
Coworker 3: What are you calling an old woman?
Me: DUH! ME!
Coworker 3: So you’re saying if you hit on a 42-year old man (his age), that would make you a cougar.
Me: Well……… yes, but it’s more complicated than that.
Coworker 3: (rolls eyes) You’re crazy.

Turns out, a cougar is a woman who seeks relations with a man 8 years younger than her. LIVE AND LEARN!

Pearls are a Girl’s Best Friend – Day 152

Day 152
Listening to:  Let the Music Play
Thought for the day:  No woman who says, “Diamonds are a girl’s best friend,” ever had a dog like Pearl.

Today is Pearl’s 9th birthday.  This photo was taken in the drive thru at McDonald’s as we waited on her birthday burger.  Pearl IS my best friend.   We are truly in sync with each other.

If I’m in a bitchy mood, she is happy to see me.
If I’m angry at the world, she is happy to see me.
If I am really sad, she is happy to see me.
If I’m happy about life, she is happy to see me.
Like I said, we’re in sync with each other.

I tell Pearl all of the time that she’s the best dog in the world even though she landed me in the ER when she almost put my eye out with her paw trying to wake me up at 5 a.m.  She just looks at me when I tell her this and wags her tail.  It’s at that point I always realize………….. she’s a better creature than me.  I will never possess the true sense of unconditional love that she shows.