Gatorade brewing is a very serious business for the McGavock High School Marching Band (130+ students). Brewing this electrolyte elixir for every marching band rehearsal is a tradition that goes back 25 years. Flavor is important, but presentation and naming each brew is critical too. The students are Gatorade connoisseurs. They know good Gatorade. Recipe names range from the favorite, Sewer Water (a mixture of Lemon Lime,Orange, and Fruit Punch powder) to Ocean Water (Glacier Freeze with a touch of Lemon Lime powder). If we change the recipes, or fail to make it right we hear about it.
My friend Nick is a certified Gatorade Godfather. He has been making Gatorade for the band for 22 years. Me? I’ve been making Gatorade for the band for six years. What do you call a peon to a Godfather? Feeling a bit cocky, I challenged him to a Gatorade dual last year. I don’t know what I was thinking. You don’t challenge the Godfather. Lucky for me, instead of pulling a Corleone and having me taken out and dumped in a river weighted down by full Gatorade containers, he accepted my challenge. The First Annual Gatorade-Off was born. We scheduled the smack down for August 2, 2011.
Going into the competition, I knew I needed a secret weapon. Nick knew I needed a secret weapon too. He’s THAT good. When I showed up for the competition, Nick sardonically said to me, “did you bring little umbrellas and shaved ice.” I said, “Nope, I brought Smurf poop.” He laughed like a Godfather would laugh. Basically, I spent two days making a Smurf butt-load of blue Polar Ice Hawaiian Punch ice cubes to add to my planned blue brew. My freezer resembled a Smurf poop cryogenics lab for a day.
Since this blog is about my Great-Grandmother’s journal, I had to fit her in here somewhere. Prior to the competition, Nick and I were chilling in a break room. He took his shoes off and quickly apologized for the smell of his feet. I said, “Godfather Nick, I have a cure! If we can find a tree ‘round here with some white bark all we have to do is make a bark-tea brew and rub your feet with it to improve the situation.” He looked at me like I had a third eye. I then confessed that I was spouting off home remedies from the early 1900s. After I theoretically cured his shhhweaty, stinky Godfatheresque feet and he put his shoes back on we moved to the Gatorade preparation area.
When I proudly showed the Godfather my cooler full of Smurf poop, he looked concerned. I felt concerned. My Smurf poop was either going to be a huge hit or huge failure. I had no way of knowing how it would affect the flavoring of my Gatorade brew if it melted. I decided if I was going to sabotage myself, I might as well sabotage him too (I’m evil like that). I offered to share the Smurf poop. He looked pleased and greedily accepted.
Mixing our individual recipes was fun. We tasted each other’s mixtures and exchanged advice. I ended up with a mixture of all Glacier Gatorade powder with a touch of Fruit Punch Gatorade powder. It was royal blue in color which is one of the school’s colors. Nick’s brew consisted of a little bit of every Gatorade flavored powder and was dark green in color. Both were strong enough to put hair on your chest. We both were aggressive. Mine was so strong that an hour later my mouth tasted like little Gatorade men were camping out on my tongue playing croquet.
With the brews mixed, we headed to the competition venue where students would pick the winner. Because I’m prettier than the Godfather, he insisted the judging be a blind taste test. The students had no clue who made which brew.
In the end, when the vote was taken, my voters were more vocal, but by the raise of hands…………………………….it was a tie. There’s always next year!
Nick allowed me to keep the trophy. I took it to work to sit on my desk. I showed it to The Mechanics today. They were jealous. I could tell.
The trophy will live in Cubicle Caverns (my office) for the next year! It looks FINE sitting next to my “Grow a Boyfriend,” Mr. Wonderful, William Shatner bobble head, and 1940s Old Hickory Fire Department photo.
The Godfather and I would like to issue a challenge to any other school or group to a Gatorade-off! Don’t be skeeered! :-)
The Second Annual Gatorade-Off will be the first week of August 2012. BE THERE!!!